If you don’t know where you are going,
how will you know when you get there?
Hang in there, retirement is only thirty years away!
Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book?
They all have phones.
What do you get when you sit under a cow???
A PAT on the head!!!!!!!!
A baby sitter is a teenager acting like an adult
while the adults are out acting like teenagers.
There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.
My reality check just bounced
Adult: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle. I don’t mind going anywhere as long as it’s an interesting path.
You know, my dad always wanted to be an astronaut.
So he went to college and took up space.-
The man who runs in front of the car gets tired.
The man who runs behind the car gets exhausted.
It doesn't matter what temperature a room is,
it's always room temperature.
Philosophy: When you get unintelligible answers to insoluble problems.
